I couldn't come up with a "walk the plank" joke, and nothing about an eye patch or a parrot or a hook hand struck me as particularly funny, so I played the headline straight.
Mark Reynolds began tonight's game batting .348/.419/.661 in 112 career at-bats against the Pirates, with seven doubles, two triples, eight homers and 21 RBIs.
You know what happened tonight. He hit a two-run homer off Brad Lincoln in the second inning to give the Orioles a 2-1 lead.
Reynolds is 1-for-2 tonight after flying to right field in the fourth.
The Orioles now lead 3-1 after consecutive two-out singles in the third by J.J. Hardy, Chris Davis and Adam Jones. Jones is 2-for-2 with an RBI.
Lincoln is 1-1 with a 6.30 ERA in two starts this season, but he's posted a 0.45 ERA in 13 relief outings covering 20 innings, which ranks second in the majors.
Wei-Yin Chen has retired four in a row and nine of 10 since Jose Tabata's infield hit leading off the second inning. He's had quality starts in two of his last three outings and four of six.
Brian Roberts struck out in his second at-bat tonight, but he singled on a 2-2 curveball in the fourth. He's 2-for-3.
Update: Adam Jones hit his 18th homer, giving the Orioles a 4-1 lead in the fifth inning.
Jones is crashing Roberts' party. He's 3-for-3 with a home run and is a triple short of the cycle.
Update II: Casey McGehee, who walked in his first two plate appearances, homered leading off the sixth to reduce the Orioles' lead to 4-2.
Here's Chen's line so far: 6 innings, 6 hits, 2 runs, 2 walks, 4 strikeouts, 1 home run. He's thrown 94 pitches, 61 for strikes.
Update III: Endy Chavez left the game in the sixth inning after reaching on a bunt single and taking second base on reliever Chris Resop's wild throw to first base. Chavez limped to second and had to be replaced by Rule 5 pick Ryan Flaherty.
Steve Pearce, who led off by reaching on shortstop Clint Barmes' throwing error, moved to third base on the play and scored on Roberts' sacrifice fly to right field. Flaherty scored on Hardy's single and Davis belted his 11th home run.
Orioles 8, Pirates 2.
The Pirates entered the game with the second-lowest bullpen ERA in the majors behind the Orioles.
Update IV: Chavez has a strained right hamstring. No idea whether it's serious enough to force him on the disabled list.
Chen left the game with one out on the seventh, a runner on third base and the Orioles leading, 8-3. He was charged with a fourth run on Andrew McCutchen's sacrifice fly off Luis Ayala. Flaherty made a diving catch in right.
Chen allowed eight hits, walked two and struck out four. He threw 103 pitches, 67 for strikes.