Guess what! I just found out last week that I’m now eligible to become a Washington Redskins season ticket holder!!! Oh Happy Day!!! How long have I dreamed of joining the throngs and cheering the B&G on to the playoffs! But that’s not all! If I invest a slightly larger amount, I can upgrade to a seat with an unobstructed view! I even got a nifty little photo of Bruce Allen and Mike Shanahan asking me if I was “in”. What a silly question. Who wouldn’t be in???? After all, if I was at the game, I could even evaluate the players during the game to see if they could be in the NFL, just like Coach Shanny does! I can see in person the vaunted Kyle Shanahan “South Coast” offense that’s taking the league by storm! I can see for myself the dreaded “3-4” defense that is causing opposing teams to tremble with fear. I can watch the team go through a pre-game workout that’s so tough, that guys get blown up even before the game starts! Oh, and the special events! It’s hard to imagine that Bruce Allen, a guy busy making personnel moves, can find the time to put together those Alumni Spectaculars and Homecoming events. Am I in? What kind of question is that? While the rest of the league is wasting their time trying to develop young talent, we’ll be sporting our tried and true veterans, just like they were that old, comfy sweatshirt that your wife is begging you to get rid of. Speed? Who needs it? Talent? Who needs it? I’ve got two brand new HD TV screens in the stadium. And I’m sure parking at FEDEX Field is a breeze.
Am I in? What kind of question is that?